What The Toil

The Pairing

Toil toil,

Wrestle.

Wrestling with emotion.

She likes to make my temperature boil,

Telling lies paired with deceit

One cup of rage, yes it’s a large feat.

We used to be close,

Until better than me did she boast,

Wishing to hurt rather than love me,

That is not the way I want either of us to be.

We no longer talk

Although I still think of her as others gawk,

Maybe one day we will reunite

Choosing to hug rather than to fight.

 

© 2012 Christy Birmingham

Advertisements

28 thoughts on “What The Toil

  1. Sue Dreamwalker

    We often find ourselves wrestling with our emotions Christyb and its a constant battle… Now whether this poem speaks of a person or your innerself.. choosing to hug Is always better than to fight.. But I know various people within my own life have chosen to fight.. I just choose to ignore and send them love via the airwaves instead.. you should try that….
    Lovely little poem Christyb. 🙂 ~Sue

    Like

    Reply
    1. Christy Post author

      Sue, thanks for your compliment. I agree that hugs win over fights hands-down every time, but get frustrated that others do not always feel that same way. I am coming to terms with the concept that we can not force someone else to embrace us when they are not ready to do so.

      Like

      Reply
    1. Christy Post author

      Dana, yes friendship can certainly have its misgivings can’t it?! I am not sure if ‘the best’ dynamic will mean a loss of friendship. Whatever happens it is nice to be able to express myself through my poetry and turn to other friends for support. Thanks for your compliments, nice to see you here.

      Like

      Reply
  2. Julie Catherine

    I can relate to this too, Christy, and it’s always a sad situation, I think. No matter what happens though, I believe it’s always best to take the ‘High Road’. And hugs are awesome! ((((Hugs)))) ~ Julie 🙂

    Like

    Reply
    1. Christy Post author

      Awe Julie, you are kind and generous. This I know about you. Hugs back to you. Although the friend may be travelling a different road I will try to be the one on the ‘high road’.

      Like

      Reply
  3. Marc Phillippe Babineau

    Great poem, if a little telling of personal problems? We all have problems when friends, or those we think to be friends, have a different view than we do on some aspect of life or another. There are many, many times in my life that I wish I would have taken the high road and forgiven and forgot. But, alas, that is not in my nature, and you can’t cross your own nature, or you would be fooling only yourself!

    Like

    Reply
    1. Christy Post author

      Ah Marc, you know yourself so well. I like that you present yourself in such an authentic way. I as well try to be authentic, which is why the friendship has not worked. I do not wish to fool myself. Thanks for stopping by here buddy.

      Like

      Reply
  4. Red

    The one who chooses to engage you is the one who truly loses. I like the poem. And I am convinced you sleep in the kitchen.

    If it is seeded IRL, know it will pass. The pettiness comes to an end when it no longer gets a reaction from you.

    {HUGZ}
    Red.

    Like

    Reply
    1. Christy Post author

      Red, it is so hard not to react to someone I care for deeply. Yet you are right that I must rise above the pettiness. I’m glad you enjoyed the poem, from a fellow poet that’s nice to hear. As for the kitchen comment, the other day someone said to me that a lot of my writing concerns food…

      Like

      Reply
  5. mywithershins

    Your poem makes me sad to think of a friendship lost because of pettiness. Perhaps it was never a solid friendship to begin with, for I have found that those friends who will stick with you through thick and thin are the truest of friends. They do not consider themselves better or their friends less than them. They love you for who you are. They support you, no matter what. There might come a time when that petty friend will realize what they have lost and feel real sorrow. Until then, the jilted friend should find someone who will be true.

    Like

    Reply
    1. Christy Post author

      Indeed, true friendship does not look down its nose at others or spew hateful remarks. Only through difficult circumstances are we often able to decipher who our “true” friends really are. I hope you have wonderful friendships and thank-you for your wise comments.

      Like

      Reply
    1. Christy Post author

      Thanks Thomas, I also hope that the last two lines will occur. I am fully prepared that they may not and I will mourn the friendship. Perhaps it is not meant to be.

      Like

      Reply
  6. Mandy's Pages

    I think this poem expresses a breach of trust and of betrayal of friendship. Been there. Know what it feels like… and am glad you are able to put it in graceful, poetic terms. I might have cursed and sworn.

    Like

    Reply
  7. Aurora, HSP

    Loving the last line, just wish everyone lived in agreement of kindness as opposed to cruelty… choices… always comes down to choices. Thank you for choosing to share this. Very resonant for me right now, Christyb 🙂 xo

    Like

    Reply
  8. Miro

    Wonderful write, Christy. Yes, emotions can a royal pain. I don’t believe the answer is to go Vulcan and completely abandon them, but we should always be aware of their true nature. It’s nice to see that you’re already capable of letting go of hurt feelings and open to reconciliation, but it seems that whenever a situation escalates to this point, there’s always going to be one person who just can’t let go, so those reconciliations rarely stick. Yes, people can change, but it takes a much time and continued effort. Most blow-ups between friends occur because one person, who is much more selfless than the other, just can’t stomach the selfish attitude anymore and feels a duty to call it out.
    Peace & grace,
    ~Miro

    Like

    Reply
    1. Christy Post author

      Good thoughts on the subject Miro. Harbouring negative feelings only keeps us tied to the past and immersed in a dark world. I am open to reconciliation and also prepared that the positive ending may not happen. Thanks for stopping by, I love to hear your wisdom!

      Like

      Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s