Poetry With Recipes – Well, Sort Of

Ah, Facebook. Recently, a discussion about hair products took centre stage within a Fan Page on Facebook. While the comments began with tips for frizzy hair, they soon turned to unusual concoctions used to cleanse hair. Both past and present day recipes were offered up on the social media page.

I was surprised by some of the choices and I was inspired to write a related poem.

Image representing Facebook as depicted in Cru...

(Deeply inhale)


Hair Recipes

By Christy Birmingham

My hair used to be short in length

And now it runs past my shoulders,

Running me out of money

As I squeeze out quarter-size amounts of shampoo to

Cover the mane, satisfy my mirror, and

Verify my self-image too.


How about a hair serum, the salon girl asks,

As she runs her manicured hands through her deep-brown tresses.

Perhaps I should try that avocado hair mask recipe,

The one ear-marked in the Cosmo magazine

That I bought for the five fast exercise tips

(I think there is a half-eaten avocado in the fridge).


Wait, I think it’s time for a cold one,

No, not to drink:

My mom told me she used beer as a hair conditioner

Before I was born.

I do have a jar of mayonnaise in the kitchen

That I can put on my head,

And need to try an egg wash for the tresses as well.


I am creating a dish for my hair,

To fill its expensive stomach that

Gobbles up products from drug store shelves.

On the bright side, I just might look

As beautiful as possible –

And make good use of that avocado in the meantime.


©2012 Christy Birmingham


Avocado (Photo credit: Wikipedia)


31 thoughts on “Poetry With Recipes – Well, Sort Of

  1. Raymond Alexander Kukkee

    Dear Christyb….food for the hair. Try white vinegar rinse…for the softest trusses..
    You can always try egg white mushed up with that avocado, just don’t add any flour and baking soda,– or get too close to the hair drier– unless you want “avocado bread-head”. “:)
    “Christyb’s hair goes food-wise and natural !”


  2. Julie Catherine

    Hey, a poetic parfait for the hair! Really enjoyed reading this Christy – loved the mix of humour and a more serious message of how much of our time and money we tend to spend on our ‘tresses’. I remember years ago, I used to rinse my hair with vinegar diluted with warm water; it came out really soft ….. 🙂


    1. Christy Birmingham Post author

      Hehe Jane! My mom says that the beer wash made her hair glisten in the sunlight. Your comment just reminded me of that. Thanks for sharing your experience and adding to the recipe 🙂


  3. Valentine Logar

    This is why I keep mine so short I can wash it with body soap if I forget shampoo at the store. I do not own a comb or brush, fingers will do, thank you very much (makes packing for vacation easy). Your hair is lovely! But mine is less effort.

    Love the poem !!


    1. Christy Birmingham Post author

      Valentine, it is tempting to cut my hair, as it is indeed more work. I am jealous of you for not owning a brush. Hey, I could actually eat the avocado if I had shorter hair, instead of putting it on my head! Thanks for the comment xx


  4. mywithershins

    Very amusing, Christy! Sometimes, the simplest ‘recipes’ work better than those expensive salon brands. For the past decade & a half, I have been colouring out the grey so need that special conditioner that keeps my hair from getting crispy. I wonder if anyone out there has a recipe for THAT! lol


  5. Dana

    Hahaha. I’ve tried a few facial scrubs and cleansers before using all natural ingredients, but I’ve never attempted avocado, beer, or mayo on my head. Sounds like a night at the pub– ick!


  6. sarahpotterwrites

    To prevent frizz – olive oil with added lavender oil, plentifully massaged into the hair before washing, then a minute smear of it on the hair when it’s dry. My hair was a nightmare before I discovered this very cheap treatment. Also, I always use organic shampoo and conditioner and no nasty chemicals (with an especially big NO to hair dyes).


  7. Aquileana

    Your long hair looks beautiful… I hope you don’ t cut It, ChristyBee…
    By the way I Will have to try the avocado hair mask one of these days,
    Sending you Hugs, Aquileana 🙂 ( talking to you from the future, dated May, 2014)



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